and you seem to be getting nowhere,
see if you can both agree to work it through
with a change in communication style.
Instead of both of you heatedly trying to get heard,
talking over each other
feeling side-tracked by the direction and momentum of the argument,
try some "Uninterrupted Listening".
One of you will speak, one of you will listen silently
then the roles will swap.
When it is your turn to speak
say everything you want to say,
without worrying what order it comes out in,
taking the time you need to formulate and express your thoughts and feelings
allowing silences if you need them
until you feel you have "emptied out"
all that you need to say,
then let your partner know that you're done
and it's their turn to speak.
Now it's your turn to listen without interrupting
looking at your partner,
to show that you are actively listening.
No need to interrupt them as it will be your turn again,
when they are done and have handed "the floor" back to you.
You can both take as many turns
as the situation needs,
only swapping roles when the person speaking
has fully finished and is ready to listen again.
Inspired by Relate